How Not To Suck At… Going To A Comic Con

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“Move bitch get out the way” – Ludacris

Okay, folks…it’s time this one gets written.  We’re at comic cons every other week throughout the year, and the same stupid things keep happening at every… single… one… and we’ve had enough.  So strap in, cosplayers, attendees, vendors, promoters, and just about everyone else that’s around a con.

We’re coming for you

BEFORE YOU GO…

  • Take a god damned shower.  Put on some freaking deodorant.  If you’re not sure if there’s a problem, walk into a Starbucks and ask to use the bathroom.  If they hand you the key… you’re fine.  If they tell you that a purchase is required…go back home and try again.  You are going to be around a lot of people throughout the course of the day… be mindful of the living force.
  • Stop at the bank before you get there.  Yes, most cons have ATMs.  Yes, most of them are off-brand ones that nobody takes responsibility for, and so they will likely either be broken or out of cash by the time you get to it.  Accept that fact and be prepared – it’s going to be a lot more expensive than you think it will, we assure you.  Back in the day, 5 $20 bills would get us everything we wanted – admission, a couple autographs, and maybe a toy.  Nowadays that might get you parking, admission, and maybe one autograph.

YOU’RE THERE, NOW WHAT?

  • STOP STOPPING!  For the love of god, people… be aware of your surroundings. Yes, there’s a lot of cool stuff to see at cons – the exhibitor booths, the cosplayers – it’s all great.  There are also at least a hundred people walking in the same direction you are, and when you suddenly come to a dead stop to check something out… or to pull out your phone and take a pic… or for any reason… you’re damned lucky if you don’t get run over.  It’s like driving on a major highway and just randomly deciding to slam on your breaks for no apparent reason – everyone hates you.  So for the love of all that’s good and holy in the world…knock it off.
  • Cosplay is not consent.  I’ve decided that I’m going to create a sign and start photobombing pictures that creepy guys are taking of girls in cosplay. Because seriously, 99 times out of 100, you can just tell by the look on the guy’s face that it’s got nothing to do with appreciating the cosplayer, or their outfit, or anything other than just being a super creepy guy with an excuse to take a picture of a girl that… well, let’s just not think about what he’s going to be doing with that picture later. It’s better that way.  Keep your hands to yourself, and just stop it with the creepy crap.  We all see you.
  • Cosplay is not a free pass.  So, interestingly… I’ve heard a few cosplayers over the years say that they “deserve” free admission into cons… simply because they’re cosplayers.  I hate to be the master of the obvious here, but you’re basically a walking copyright infringement.  It’s a lot like podcasting – you’re supposed to be doing this because it’s something you’re into, not because you’re expecting financial gain.
  • Don’t sell if you’re not buying a table. There is nothing more annoying to us as people who pay for booth spaces at events than someone we don’t know walking up to us and handing us a flyer for their crap, or their other event, or trying to get us to buy something…seriously. There’s this kid who we ran into a Motor City Comic Con walking around telling people about his “private art show”… in his hotel room.  Yeah, nothing creepy or sketchy about that at all, right?  And we’ve seem him several times since then at other cons – just stop it.  Stop laying your portfolio out on a random table outside the con area and trying to flag people down – if you want to sell stuff at a con, pay the money and get yourself a booth.  Otherwise, we hope you get thrown out of the building.
  • Con Organizers: Be Available!  I cannot begin to tell you how frustrating it is as someone who’s paid money to have a booth or two at a con to then not be able to find anyone when something needs attention.  It might be stupid stuff (hey, we were supposed to have 4 more chairs in our setup), or it might be something serious (hey, you forgot to put the electrical and internet drops in our booth and we can’t do a damned thing until you do that), but being unable to find someone is incredibly infuriating.

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