Why and How To Act Like a Human

If you’re in sales, you can mass email 1,000 people with the same message and hope to get business from a small percentage of them.  If you’re a job searcher, you can do a quick search for “java”, click “select all”, and mass-apply for 200 jobs without even reading the description.  If you’re a recruiter, you can gang-email 100 candidates on LinkedIn telling them they are perfectly suited for your role.

Ahh technology.  Scale.  Automation.  How far we’ve come in being more efficient and less human…

I have a long-held belief that more isn’t better.  Better is better.

If you’re a guy hoping to find your soul mate, pick a strategy that doesn’t involve pitching marriage to EVERY female in a singles bar as your pickup line, then moving on quickly to the next unfortunate gal when she says no (if she says yes I have a separate rant for both of you).

Somehow we feel like this machine gun approach is appropriate behavior in business.  Step up your game y’all.

The ease of communicating from behind a computer or smartphone doesn’t justify being less human in our interactions.  When you send me your 3-page multi-colored email that you copied and pasted in 50 other emails, you’ve just feigned a personal interaction.  Now I’m the girl at the singles bar who can see that you just want any girl, not necessarily me.  And I don’t like that feeling.

I don’t want just anyone as my friend, business partner, client, or employee.

WHY ACT HUMAN

22-pris_eyes_glowMore meaningful human relationships.  Business and otherwise.  That’s it.  Could there be a higher goal in interacting with one another?   Maybe you’ll help someone find a job.  Maybe you’ll connect two people in a mutually beneficial way.  Maybe you’ll sell something.

Everyone has an intent behind every communication.  If you craft an email, make a cold call, or walk into a networking meeting with the intent to take as much as you can as quickly as you can, we hear you loud and clear.  Your thoughts manifest themselves into behavior most of us resent.

If your intent is “how can I be of help to you?” we hear that too.

HOW TO ACT HUMAN

  • Don’t pretend to be communicating one on one when you’re not. Don’t interact with the masses unless you have something of value for the masses.
  • Take an extra millisecond and spell words out. I’m not your buddy that you’re drunk texting.  First impressions matter.  Be personal and professional.
  • Whenever you have the chance, even if your email message to multiple people has the same content, take the time to personalize each one. Yes, it takes longer but it pays dividends.
  • I interact with dozens of new people every week. Each is a separate, unique person.  A person who perhaps is unfulfilled in her current job, or who hasn’t had a vacation in 3 years, or who just lost her friend to cancer.  Be mindful of the fact that there is a person behind every keyboard.
  • Keep a database that includes your interactions and something unique about each person. Look to connect your contacts with one another when it benefits both parties, without giving thought to whether or how it benefits you.
  • Don’t treat each communication like a transaction. Play the long game.  Relationships of any kind should be marathons, not sprints.